Illustration by Courtney La Forest
Dear Minecraft addicts,
Shut up. Seriously, the number one thing that you can do to piss me off is to tell me what you just built on your server.
I don’t fucking care, and I never will.
I do not want to hear about your “awesome” house made out of blocks and I don’t want to see Reddit posts about what you found in a cave today.
Last week I came home after a long day at work to find my girlfriend watching a live stream of some dude playing Minecraft. Not making a tutorial or explaining anything in the game, just playing.
Who in their right mind wants to sit there and watch someone they don’t even know click on a mouse to “mine” square rocks for hours on end? I’d rather have come home to her cheating on me.
Now I’m not bashing on the game itself, all I ask is that you don’t tell me anything about it. I want to be living under a metaphoric rock on the topic. I am no longer going to even pretend that I give a shit about your 40-story house or all the diamonds in your chest. In exchange, I will never speak of my exciting Pokémon adventures.
Sincerely,
I Don’t Give A Craft
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